I recently saw a new version of the movie “Emma” and cannot get it out of my mind. Why? Maybe because it reminds me of myself in some ways.
Here is a young woman who enjoys the security of a loving family and whose basic needs have always been met. She is interested in people. She finds herself “interfering” (though with the best of intentions) in their lives and then is chagrined at some of the consequences. She makes premature judgments about people’s character. All the while, she takes a most worthy man for granted until the thought of losing him opens her eyes to the treasure that he is. She hurts people unthinkingly and is reprimanded—and then repents and seeks to mend the damage. She is humiliated and humbled. She feels unworthy of love, yet she comes to be loved by the one who knows her best and knows all her faults, yet sees her heart and loves her dearly.
Sometimes I feel that way when I mess up. As much as I strive to do what is right and loving, my old nature slips a hurtful word through my lips, or a critical thought or attitude clouds my mind. I am humiliated and humbled. I feel myself unworthy of love. Yet my husband and my God reaffirm their unconditional love to me and I go on to live another day, learning and growing, knowing that God is indeed at work in my life. I can hardly wait till the day when I fall into His loving arms and thank Him for that love and all His care and attention to make me what He wants me to be.